Eggnog (if that’s the correct way to spell it…) really makes you wonder: How did humans first think that chugging a spiced and spiked egg-yolk-and-milk mixture was a good idea?

Milk, sugar, eggs, and nutmeg? Everything in that lineup sounds delicious. So why does the drink taste so far from it? Maybe it’s simply a textural thing, but to me, eggnog reminds me of mucus. And that’s obscenely gross.

And, trust me, once you’ve tried eggnog, you will not only know that you don’t like it… you’ll know that you hate it as I straight up HATE it!

No one can convince me to drink eggnog, ok? Not even blood relatives.

Because, even if you get it right, it still tastes horrible! The smell is like an omelet and the consistency defies belief. It`s a thick, nasty sludge, that`s what this vile thing is. Sure, there is some interesting alcohol to make you try not to puke right away, but there’s nothing good about eggnog.

Even if you succumb to the general holiday cheer, please drink responsibly. Not just for the alcohol, but also for the calories: eggnog can pack in upwards of 500 big ones per cup.

The roots

Despite its “love it or hate it” fame, eggnog has charmed drinkers for nearly a millennium.

This classic hot cocktail remains a holiday staple. Creamy, hot, and sweet.

Eggnog. The drink that stirs up memories for most people, either you love it or hate it. Either way you feel, you must admit it has become embedded in our holiday tradition.

There are differing opinions as to the origin of the name for this famous drink. One version says that nog derives from an Old English word for strong beer, hence “noggin”. Another version attributes the name to Colonial America where colonists referred to thick drinks as “grog” and eggnog as “egg-and-grog”.

It is believed that the eggnog tradition began in Europe as an adaptation of the various milk and wine punches often served at social gatherings. In the 17th century, eggnog was used as a toast to one’s health and was consumed by the well-to-do of society as milk and eggs were scarce commodities in Europe.

When the brew was brought to the “New World,” colonists added a new twist, rum. The rum Americans could get from the Caribbean was considerably less expensive than the other liquors shipped from England. And so, along with the readily available supply of milk and eggs in the colonies, the rum version quickly became a popular drink for people of all classes.

The basic recipe for eggnog has not changed over the years (eggs beaten with sugar, milk, cream and some kind of spirit) and remains a favorite for holiday parties. And don’t forget the Secret Santa ingredient: nutmeg.

The makin’s

6 large eggs, separated
3/4 cup superfine sugar
2 cups whole milk
3 cups heavy cream, plus more for garnish
1/2 cup bourbon
1/4 cup dark rum
1/4 cup Cognac
Freshly grated nutmeg, for sprinkling

The drill
Beat yolks in a very large bowl until thick and pale
Slowly beat in sugar
Whisk in milk and 2 cups cream
Mix in bourbon, rum, and Cognac
Cover, and refrigerate for up to 1 day
Just before serving, beat whites until stiff peaks form
Fold whites into eggnog
Whisk remaining 1 cup cream until stiff peaks form, and fold into eggnog
Sprinkle with nutmeg

** Serve in small punch cups, margarita glasses, teacups, wine glasses, or other fancy-looking festive vessels



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